How I Know I Have the Best Husband Ever

I have the best husband in the world.  And I know some of you will argue your husband is better but before we get into the debate, I'd like to lay out my reasons for thinking he's the best.

• He makes me coffee in the morning and frequently I don't even have to ask.  
• Why it matters: I don't always want coffee.  He always asks and if I seem undecided, he makes it for me anyway.  Then if I don't want coffee, he doesn't get mad
• He calls me when he's leaving work.
• Why it matters: Right now we have one working vehicle.  He calls to ask if I need anything from the store.  If I do he always cheerfully picks it up and brings it home.  If I don't then he still happily comes home to me.  
• The other reason it matters: He knows I like to have dinner about ready for him when he gets home.  By calling me, I know whether to slow dinner down or speed it up.
• He calls me from work and/or IM's with me throughout the day.
• Why it matters: I know this would annoy the crud out of some women but he's not just my husband, he's also my best friend.  We chat and tease each other all day long.  If one of us is having a rough day, the other is there to life them up.  I can always count on him to lift my spirits.
• He works. Hard.  Frequently at a job he doesn't really like.
• Why it matters: I'm a stay at home wife and we both really like that.  He supports us financially.  And while occasionally things are tight, and it would be much easier if I worked too, he never asks me to get a job.  If I wanted to work outside our home, he'd support my decision and would do whatever I needed to help out but he'd never ask me to.
• When I'm having a precursor to a bad day as described in a previous post, he comes home, hugs me, tells me he loves me and kisses me.
• Why it matters: He's ready to be loving and affectionate no matter how cranky or snarly I am.  And when that bad day finally materializes?  He holds me while I cry and not only tells me it's okay, but makes me believe it too.
• No matter what I do or say, he's there.
• Why it matters: I'm not an easy person to live with.  I accept that about myself.  So does he.  Enough said about that.
• His values are the same as mine.
• Why it matters: Although it may sometimes seem that work is a priority to him, that's not true.  Family is the priority and that sometimes means he puts what he wants to do aside, so he can provide for me.  He put his desire to move to Oklahoma on hold for eleven years because of familial obligations.  Before we moved, he asked me if I needed to stay longer.
• He lets me hold the remote.
• Why it matters:  I have control issues.  He knows that and while he occasionally holds the remote to annoy me, he frequently lets me hold it.  In return, I try to turn on things I know he likes to watch.
• He senses my mood and changes his behavior accordingly.
• Why it matters:  Notice I didn't say he does whatever it takes to appease me.  I said he changes his behavior.  Sometimes that means making me angry until I blow up.  I feel better afterward though.  Sometimes it means talking about things that hurt me until I cry.  Though after a good cry with him holding me, I feel refreshed and don't hurt.  Sometimes it means teasing me until I lighten up and laugh.  I think that's self explanatory.
• He encourages the child in me to come out and play.
• Why it matters:  I have fond memories of my childhood.  I also have terrible memories of my childhood.  At times I grew up way too fast.  He lets me be the little girl I didn't always get to be.
• He does chores around the house.
• Why it matters: I'm not always the best housekeeper and I know it.  However, he is always more than willing to help me out and do what he can around the house.  If I ask him to do something he does it.  Not the way I would but it gets done and really isn't that what matters?
• He loves me when I'm happy and childlike, he loves me when I'm on the warpath, he loves me when I collapse in tears.  He loves me.
• Why it matters:  His love is unconditional.  I feel accepted and cherished.

Thanks for reading my ramblings.  Next I'll try to do a posting about what I do in return for him.

Facebook Status

This was my facebook status at one point today:

Did you know that the people that seem the strongest are usually the most sensitive?  Did you know the one who takes care of others all the time is usually the one that needs it the most? ~ Did you know the 3 hardest things to say are: I love you, I'm sorry and Help me?  Put this as your status if you agree...Not easy huh?

This was an especially poignant status for me.  It was posted by my cousin Lynn.  (*waves into cyberspace "Hi Lynn")

It reminded me a lot of my mother.  She spent a lot of time taking care of me, my sister, my dad when he was sick, and even my grandparents.  She took so much on and it was so hard for her to say she needed help.  I wish she had said a little more often.  I know she felt like she didn't have any other choice, if she didn't do it who would?

I do wonder if she would have lived longer if she'd asked for help more often, instead of always shouldering the load alone.  I have a tendency to do the same thing but I also tend to fall apart and ask for help.  I have a wonderful husband and daughter who usually know I'm about to crumble about three days before I do.  They spend those three days poking at me.  Not trying to help, not trying to get me to open up about whatever is stressing me out. Poking at me.  It sends me over the edge, I cry, I get mad, I stop talking to them.  I generally behave like an idiot.

And then I do what I should have done all along and talk to them. I am getting better about it.  I'm learning to talk before they start poking me.  I'm learning when they start poking it's time to figure out what's wrong and try to fix it rather than contemplating carrying around a rolling pin to bash over their heads.

Basically, I'm a work in progress.  And that's okay.  As long as I'm working on it.

So the next time a family member, a friend, a loved one is being incredibly strong, taking care of everyone else, maybe just reach out and take care of them for a minute.  Offer a hug, make them dinner, sit with a sick  relative or just pray for them.  You'd be surprised what a difference you might make.

Quiz Answers

So how did you like the quiz? I know it was a challenge but I did say it was obscure lyric Saturday. Don't be discouraged if you had trouble, no one got all the songs. I'm looking at ideas for the next one. Some of them include a single artist and multiple choice for the answers. If you have any thoughts or suggestions please send them my way.

Okay so the way these songs were chosen was I put my entire iTunes library on shuffle and pushed play. After filtering out music without vocals, these were the first 20 songs that played.

And now for the answers:

1. Talk about stacked. They're both chrome.

"Hello, I'm a Truck" by Red Simpson

2. You got to grab onto my belt if you wanna be free.

"Love Injection" by Bang Tango

3. There's an old man sitting next to me, making love to his tonic and gin.

"Piano Man" by Billy Joel

4. Can I take you out to the picture show?

"Maxwell's Silver Hammer" by The Beatles

5. Where was the passion when you need it the most?

"Bad Day" by Daniel Powter

6. Don't let this old gold cross in this Crimson Tide t-shirt throw ya

"Southern Voice" by Tim McGraw

7. Isn't it nice to know good will conquer evil?

"No One Mourns the Wicked" by Kristen Chenoweth, from the musical "Wicked"

8. And right now they're building a coffin your size

"Mama" by My Chemical Romance

9. Burn through Mississippi with the Big Easy on my mind

"New Orleans" by Kid Rock

10. I'm your dream, make it real. I'm your eyes when you must steal

"Sad but True" by Metallica

11. Turn off the lights and I'll glow

"Ice Ice Baby" by Vanilla Ice

12. And I've made myself a world and it's worked so perfectly

"Shameless" by Billy Joel (he wrote the song and recorded it 2 years before Garth Brooks recorded it)

13. You're crying me a river but I've got to get across

"The Other Side" by Aerosmith

14. Those seven deadly sins are wicked for sure, Jack's got those plus eleven more!

"Black Jack Slim's Cutthroat Inn" by The Jolly Rogers

15. You believe but what you see, you receive but what you give

"Amaranth" by Nightwish

16. Your jokes ain't funny and there's nothing you say that I wanna hear

"Get the F*ck Out" by Skid Row

17. A tongue as sharp as a razor but she had a fancy car

"Helmethead" by Great Big Sea

18. You can kiss me with the windows open while the rain comes pouring inside

"This Kiss" by Faith Hill

19. I'll push his love far away from me

"We Can Be Together" by Debbie Gibson

20. I stayed the cold day with a lonely satellite

"New Moon on Monday" by Duran Duran.

A Quiz

First quiz is over! Answers up shortly!

A Quiz

It's obscure song lyric Saturday!

I've put together a little quiz just for fun. Here's how it works.

I've enabled comment modification, so I have to approve the comment before it posts. You can comment anonymously if you want. Try not to look up the lyrics, that spoils the fun. I'll post a phrase from a song, it could be any genre. You tell me the song title and if you can, the original artist, though artist is not required. Quiz will run until Monday at noon Pacific time. Ready? Here we go:

1. Talk about stacked. They're both chrome.

2. You got to grab onto my belt if you wanna be free.

3. There's an old man sitting next to me, making love to his tonic and gin.

4. Can I take you out to the picture show?

5. Where was the passion when you need it the most?

6. Don't let this old gold cross in this Crimson Tide t-shirt throw ya

7. Isn't it nice to know that good will conquer evil?

8. And right now they're building a coffin your size.

9. Burn through Mississippi with the Big Easy on my mind.

10. I'm your dream, make you real. I'm your eyes when you must steal

11. Turn off the lights and I'll glow

12. And I've made myself a world and it's worked so perfectly

13. You're crying me a river and I've got to get across

14. Those seven deadly sins are wicked for sure, Jack's got those plus 11 more!

15. You believe but what you see, you receive but what you get.

16. Your jokes ain't funny and there's nothing you say that I wanna hear

17. A tongue as sharp as razor but she had a fancy car

18. You can kiss me with the windows open while the rain comes pouring inside

19. I'll push his love far away from me

20. I stayed the cold day with a lonely satellite

Post your answers as comments. I'll post all the comments after the quiz ends on Monday at noon Pacific time.

OMG, I'm Boring Even Me

So I just perused some of my previous posts and realized, I'm even boring myself. And who could blame me with gems like the one llllooooonnnnnggggg paragraph about The Chowder and this rambling post about the woes of our air conditioning.

I am now contemplating what to do about said boring of you my poor innocent readers. (I'm supposed to be cleaning out a cabinet right now. Shh! Don't tell Music Man.)

After long and careful thought, I've decided what I really need is change. And way less clutter. So in my attempts to have both. I shall be further boring you with before and after pictures as I declutter my home and hopefully change the way I feel about my life right now.

You see I miss California and while moving here was an adventure, (Thanks a lot Mom for forever attaching the word adventure to the word move in my mind) I'm just not entirely sure I like adventure. I think part of my melancholy and absenteeism from the world has to do with my missing of palm trees and rain falling in the winter, not the summer.

It really is odd to me how similar my new home and my old one are. A lot of the same stores and restaurants are here. The management company of my apartment complex owns property in California. Miss Goofy is still goofy and still works hard to not do her schoolwork (I think I might know where she gets the procrastination bug from), Music Man hates his job just like he did in California, I'm still trying to figure out what I want to do when I become a grownup, though I do have a better idea about this one than I used to.

And then weird things happen. Like it rains in July. It's not supposed to rain in July. Or and this one was strange for entirely different reasons. You have to have a permit to set off fireworks. I'm from the land of wild fires, I have no issue with not setting off fireworks at all. I am totally okay with going and sitting in a parking lot to watch someone else set them off. But you have to have a permit? And it's not like you have to go to a class to learn safe handling of fireworks, no you just have to pay a fee.

Our city doesn't allow fireworks, not that it stopped some of my neighbors, and I have to say, I for one am kind of glad. Having grown up around the threat of wildfires, I don't have as much of a problem with no fireworks as people who didn't grow up that way. Besides, nowadays, the fireworks suck.

Remember sparklers? Remember stepping on the hot metal stick and burning your feet cause you were barefoot even though your mother told you to put on shoes? Remember learning not to just drop the sparkler but putting it in the bucket? That was part of the fun of fireworks. Remember hearing about the kid who blew half his arm off because he was playing with fireworks without parental supervision? That was an important lesson to those of us who didn't do that. We learned by hearing our parents talk of the dangers that we needed to listen or bad stuff would happen and it would be our own fault. Now we sue the company who made the fireworks cause Mommy and Daddy are too busy getting high to watch their kids and make sure they don't try to see what will happen to GI Joe if we attach a rocket to his back.

Wow, I really need to quit watching Christopher Titus and go clean out my bathroom cabinet.

I'll post before and after pictures eventually.

The Many Faces of Music Man

This is Music Man happy:

This is Music Man mad:

This is Music Man being pestered:

This is Music Man killing zombies:

The End!

Lately I've Been...

Bet you thought I'd forgotten all about you! And this exciting list!

Never fear, although I frequently get distracted by streaking cats and bright shiny things, I also eventually come back to doing what I started six years ago. Not that my blog is six years old but can you imagine if it was?

Twenty minutes later

So, I seem to have gone off into a fantasy land. What was I saying again?

Oh yeah, my list for this...week?

• Watching my cat randomly streak from room to room and then stop to lick his paw

• Laundry (duh, I have these wonderful new toys)

• Hugging my sissy who I got to see for the first time in over a year last Friday

• Scratching flea bites (I am so bombing the apartment this weekend)

• Asking Miss Goofy if her schoolwork is done yet and why she hasn't turned it in to me

• Finding really good Mexican food (happy dance!)

• Melting in the heat and humidity

• Laughing at Miss Goofy who keeps kicking the fan in my room and then saying, "Ow! I keep kicking that stupid fan!"

• Playing Zynga games on facebook

• Procrastinating instead of doing any housework

I know I've done more stuff, I just can't remember what it was. It kind of reminds me of a essay thing I read about how busy a person was all day but when they look around they can't see what they've done cause nothing they set out to do was finished. Yeah, that's me.

Well, I have things to do that I'll probably avoid and instead spend my time watching shiny butterflies out the window or watching the cat to time how long he goes between scratches. You know something completely and totally beneficial to my life.

Laundry Saga Update

So today, eventually, maintenance finally came by the apartment. They have to order a part for the water valve in the laundry room.

He did, however, say it was okay to go ahead and use the machine for the weekend since it wasn't leaking much by this evening and any leaking it did do was back down the drain anyway. And he did fix the dryer vent issue. At least for now. They will have to tear apart a piece of the wall to fix the water valve issue as they have to replace the whole thing.

That being said, I have now washed three loads of laundry, dried two, have the third in now and Miss Goofy washed and dried a load. I have at least two more loads of clothes, one of sheets and one of towels and table linens to do tomorrow. I'm just so excited to have this wonderful tool for completing my household chores. It makes it so nice!

Well, I have to go fold towels now! It's so nice not having to go to the laundry room!

Aren't They Beautiful?

So here is my wonderful anniversary gift from my wonderful husband! No more lugging laundry to the laundry room of the complex! No more laundromat!

I'd love them even more if the water valve for the washer wasn't leaking and the hose that's built into the building for dryer exhaust wasn't too short! Hopefully maintenance will be here early to fix the issues and I can use my new beautiful machines. I love them so much! And that bookshelf is totally coming out of there later tonight!

Something Big is Coming on Thursday

Sometime between noon and 6 pm on Thursday the 26th of May, something big will be happening at my house.

Tune in this week for pictures...

A Favorite Author

Okay so it's not a secret anymore that I've been working on a romance novel or two (possibly twenty). I've enjoyed writing them and reading other people's work. I'm of the firm belief that just because I have the same basic premise, doesn't mean I'm stealing the author's work. After all, how I picture the story turning out and how they do is invariably different.

On that note, I was poking around online for a bit today and went to one of my favorite authors sites. I swear I didn't write this, but I could have except for a few minor changes. For example, while I like several of the same authors as she does, I haven't read some of the others work . And while I like the occasional country song, I'm not sure I'm comfortable saying I like country music although the music they now call country sounds a lot like what we called pop when I was a teenager.

I can totally get into the diet Mt. Dew thing though. Yes, that's possibly my deepest darkest secret. I like Diet Mt. Dew. *Sigh

I'd rather have a Butterfinger than a Hershey bar with or without almonds though if that's all you got I'll take it. I'm really not into the Rob Pattinson or Twilight thing. I read part of the first book and watched the first movie. All I could think at the end was I wanted them to stop whining. I remember when vampires were cool. Anyone else remember, Interview with a Vampire?

I'd rather watch the Simpsons or Law & Order: Criminal Intent than the Gilmore Girls. Though Dog the Bounty Hunter is cool if you don't take it too seriously. Don't get me wrong, I think they do a good deed and it's not a job I want but seriously if you can't carry a weapon due to a felony conviction in your past, bounty hunting may not be for you.

I totally agree with her assessment of teen years and the reality of being older and having responsibilities. Sometimes, you have to run to the store and don't have time to perfectly apply six layers of make-up.

Her thoughts on why she likes her job are totally true for me. Seriously I get everyone of them. Oh and the part about liking Nickelback, they are so in my playlists for all kind of my stories.

Thank you Rhonda! You made me feel so much better about myself today!

Promises

So when my husband and I decided to move our family to Oklahoma, a number of factors went into the decision. Concerns about our families, our future, our dreams and goals, costs and what we were willing to give up. It took years before we made a decision.

And then we didn't tell anyone what we'd decided. For a long time.

I won't go into all the thoughts we covered right now, we had a lot of things to think about but some of the issues included being there for my grandmother while she nursed my grandfather, who was dying from Alzheimer's, whether we even wanted to surround ourselves with Music Man's family when they haven't had anything to do with him in years and finally, what to me seemed like the most important: air conditioning.

I knew we weren't going to leave while Grandpa was still alive. I needed to be there to offer whatever help I could and to make sure Grandma was going to recover before we left.

Music Man knew we weren't going to live in the small town he was born in and we probably wouldn't see much of his family.

We both made our peace with both situations and when the time came, we moved.

A lot of my friends have asked why a California Girl would be willing to move to Oklahoma. When we first arrived here we stayed in his uncle's fishing cabin which has since made me very frightened to read Henry David Thoreau's Walden after Music Man commented one day on the similarities. I had no idea it was a horror story. ; )

One of the biggest things that had worried this very California Girl, was the heat. And the humidity. I don't tolerate heat well. I tend to bloat and swell up like a balloon. As long as I have air conditioning I'm okay. Music Man promised me we'd have air conditioning. He's so sweet. Or he didn't want to see his wife looking like a puffer fish and to be honest, I think it might be the latter.

At the cabin, we purchased two window air conditioners. One for the bedroom, one for the living room. I survived while we were there. I even managed to stop killing crickets at three in the morning. I learned to just casually flick them off me and then wake Music Man who would capture the offending insect and escort him outside. I'm still not sure why the crickets loved me so very much.

We've been in our apartment since July 9th. I had maintenance out to fix the air conditioner at least four times last summer. I went to turn it on a week or so ago just to check and make sure it was properly functioning. It isn't. I put in a request to have maintenance to come fix it again.

I'd say I'm sure they'll fix it properly, but four times last year...

Oh Dear

My husband is a bit of a nerd. I love him but he is what he is. Well, I'm pretty sure I've now lost all ability to laugh at his nerdiness.

While he was looking at the Think Geek website and showing me all sorts of things he "needs", I spotted my downfall. It was an R2D2 pepper mill.

I am officially a geek.

So A Funny Thing Happened Today...

Okay it really wasn't funny at all.

We had a blizzard here in Tulsa this week. It's made it impossible to get out of the parking lot at our apartment. So my wonderful husband has been home the past two days.

Our apartment complex has signs they put out occasionally that read "Freeze warning, let your faucets drip". Now, we lived in snow country in California. If you properly insulate your pipes, you really shouldn't have any problem with them freezing. To be safe, we did leave the faucets open if it was going to be especially cold. So when we saw the signs the first time we thought, "uh oh, we might have a problem."

Blizzards include wind, just in case you didn't know. When your water heater is outside and there is a blizzard coming, there is a good chance your pilot light will go out. No amount of running water will keep the water heater from freezing. Not with the wind and snow collecting under the heater.

So when maintenance accuses you of not leaving the water on, it's a bit irksome. Especially when they've already had a fit over the screws they put in the outside door to the water heater rather than fixing the door.

When the head of maintenance brings his entourage of four guys and they don't bother to wipe their boots off outside and track snow all over your living room, you tend to get a little annoyed. Especially when you realize they did the same thing this past summer only it was oil from the asphalt they tracked in.

Then the head idiot proceeds to damage the door to your a/c/heater unit, the one that is a safety issue cause it also opens directly to the water heater closet and when you woke up in the middle of the night one night to the dog having a meltdown and look outside you see the outside door is open and realize someone was trying to break into your apartment through the connecting door you had your husband screw shut the heater door and then called maintenance in the morning and requested they repair the outside door so they didn't have to clean the apartment after removing your dead carcass and maintenance only screws shut the outside and tells you that's what they would have done to the inside door, it's a little insulting. Especially when they damage the inside door and you know they're going to charge you when you move out.

What was my point in telling you all of this? I don't know, Music Man thought I needed to rant. If you're looking for an apartment in the Tulsa area, email me and I'll tell you where NOT to move.

What the Hell?

Okay harsh title I know but I believe I am justified. I was watching the news and saw a news story about the drug being used for death row inmates in Oklahoma. I was concerned as you might imagine so I googled "Oklahoma death row drug" and this article came up. In case you're too busy to read the whole article let me explain. This is a drug that the news story on television said was the same drug that they use to euthanize animals! Now the AP article said it was chemically related to the drug used on animals.

I understand there's a shortage of the drug usually used to kill death row inmates. I'm not sure however how good an idea it is to use a drug that clearly states it's for canine use only. This would probably be a good place to talk about alternatives to death row but I have to say I do believe that occasionally putting someone to death is the only solution.

I was a teenager in Los Angeles during the time of the Night Stalker. My grandmother was a very good friend with one of his victims. Her murder was gruesome and the stuff of nightmares. There are people in this world who choose to commit evil and atrocious crimes. Sentencing them to death is sometimes the least costly solution. Housing them in prison forever is impractical and I understand that.

And while I'd love to discuss solutions for prison overcrowding I'm not an expert nor do I feel like it's something I have enough information on to offer an opinion. But when the manufacturer says don't do this and we do it anyway, then we've got a problem.

Two news articles later and I hear something about state flower, state rock and now someone wanting to choose a state gun.

Hmm, maybe I do have a solution to the prison overcrowding problem...

The Year of Thin Waists and Fat Wallets

So that's what I've dubbed this year. So far, well, we're working on it.

Mostly I've been playing facebook games like CityVille. It's addicting. Seriously, I'm going to be seeking a 12 step group for it soon.

"Hi, I'm Micki, I'm a CityVilleaholic."

"Hi Micki."

Sorry, just imagining the meetings.

I started reading "The Hobbit" by J.R.R. Tolkien last night. I'm enjoying it a lot.

What else can I say...oh, it's cold here. Like it's been in the single digits cold. Like wow that's not a misprint, 5 degrees is really cold.

Mostly I just needed to check in so I have a more recent post than Miss Goofy. Now I can harass her.

Thanks for being so patient with me.