NaNoWriMo and My Story

I had a lot happen in my childhood. Don't worry this isn't a crying session, this is a post about healing.

After my dad passed away, I was terrified. Who was going to protect me from the world? My strong Daddy was gone and I was left all alone. Okay, I had my mom, who was incredibly strong. And my sister, who I love dearly cause she's always supporting me. And my grandparents, who have always loved me unconditionally. So there were a lot of people who would protect me. At nearly 13 I couldn't really see that though.

I started having problems with school attendance in 2nd grade. Not a story I'm going to get into here, but it did start way before my dad passed, with time it only got worse.

At 13, I remember my mom driving me to school and parking. I remember taking a deep breath and getting out of the car. I remember walking to the front of the car and not being able to force myself to cross the street to go to school. I remember feeling panicked and like if I didn't go back home, something awful would happen. I remember being so afraid to leave the house, I couldn't walk out the door.

It's gotten worse over the years. I try so hard to get out and do things. Some days it's easy and like nothing bad ever happened. Some days though, it's like just stepping outside to check to see if it's hot is more than I can handle. I don't know why this happens or when it's going to, I just know some days, I can't go anywhere.

The more time I have to prepare for an event, the worse I get. That's why I'm sharing this now.

NaNoWriMo takes place in November. NaNoWriMo is an acronym for National Novel Writing Month. You spend the month of November writing a novel or 50,000 words. It's something I'd wanted to participate in for several years. Last November I did. Not only did I participate, I was a winner. I wrote more than 50,000 words in the month of November. It was hard work. It required a lot of time and thought. It was one of the most rewarding moments of my life when I hit the 50,000 word mark.

Recently, I got an email inviting me to participate in a fundraising event for the non-profit that puts on NaNoWriMo. All the money raised from this event goes to The Office of Letters and Light, the parent non-profit that does NaNoWriMo. This is a great non-profit that helps bring writing programs to schools and to adults. It's making a huge difference in my life as it has in many other people's lives.

I'm raising $350 so that I can go in November to San Francisco for a six hour writing event. Last year there were over 200 people who went. There are panels with published authors and publishers. There's food and drinks. There's raffle prizes. But most of all there's people. Lots of people. It's a wonderful networking opportunity but again, lots of people.

I'm terrified. I can do this, I know I can. But it's going to take a lot of strength to go to this event. I have a good support system and am very blessed. Yet still terrified.

This is the link to donate if you have the ability: Send Micki to The City.

If you can't donate money, but want to encourage me, go ahead and leave me a message in the comments.

Thanks for all the support!